We might not have Ashton Kutcher to thank for our obsession with collecting social media followers, but his race with CNN to see who could reach one million followers first certainly lent some legitimacy to online popularity contests. While it’s understandable that celebs have millions of Twitter and Facebook followers, it’s a little suspicious when regular folks try to replicate the numbers. It’s ludicrous to believe that the relationships have any worth, and when you want to be taken seriously online, worth is what it’s all about.

Ok, so numbers do count. It’s difficult to be taken seriously as an industry leader when you only have 10 people following you on Twitter and two of those are your mom and dad. What you have to is work to build a community that reflects your interests, is relevant to your social media goals and is manageable.

Dos and don’ts of getting started

Do

Actually, starting with your mom and dad is not a bad way to go. When you first join a social network the chances are that you only know a handful of people and you have to start somewhere. So send out friend invitations to your family, even the ones abroad that you haven’t seen since you were two-years-old. Add your friends (past and present) and work colleagues (past and present). If you belong to any clubs go in search of fellow members and if you’ve kept a collection of business cards see if you can find their owners.

Don’t

Don’t yield to temptation and try to buy followers. The chances that your purchased friends will have anything in common with you are slim to none. The chances that you’ll suddenly have friended a bunch of spam bots and shamelessly self-promotional marketers touting easy-money solutions are very, very good. When real people venture along and see what you’ve got in your stable they’ll turn tail and run faster than the ANC from an open-toilet drama.

Do

Follow and friend those who follow and friend you. It’s polite, but more than that, they probably have similar interests and could add value to your life.

Check them out first though. If their profile looks suspicious, i.e., they follow way, way more people than follow them or their profile picture is a provocatively-posed, negligibly-clad man or woman or their only updates include phrases such as “Find out how to make more $$$ now!”, it’s your turn to run like a scandal-facing politician at election time.

Don’t

Don’t be over-eager. If you’ve managed to get a handful of genuinely interested people to join your community, don’t pepper them with inane messages or spam them with marketing spiel. Be cool – be interested and initiate conversation by all means, but be cool.

Do

Keep looking for and adding new people; this includes people you meet in real life and scouring your followers’ followers and followees for more relevant contacts. Try looking in directories for people in your field. Twitter has WeFollow and Twellow, where people add themselves to different categories so that they can be found easily. In fact, add yourself to these directories and you could pick up a bunch of new followers.

Don’t

Incomplete profiles are a pain in the nether region. People want to know who they’re following or friending or linking to. If you don’t complete your profile bio or add a profile picture they won’t be able to get a clear image of you and they’ll scarper.

There is some debate about profile pictures; some people reckon that only a picture of you will do and that avatars (pictures that aren’t you like Betty Boop, your dog or a psychedelic work of art) are passé. But, personally I don’t have anything against avatars. If your avatar says something about you or means something to you then I don’t see why you shouldn’t be able to use it and still be taken seriously. Bear in mind, this comes from someone who has a cow as her avatar.

Do

Add value to your followers’ and friends’ lives. Post links to interesting articles, initiate interesting conversations, get into debates; do anything but drone on and on about yourself and what you had for breakfast. The occasional update about a particularly good meal you had somewhere won’t hurt you, but don’t make a habit of it.

Don’t be boring and don’t be a sourpuss; in today’s stressful, overcrowded life people are choosing to actively avoid negativity and this includes cutting off people who do nothing but moan about the glass that stays stubbornly half-empty.

Do

Make it easy for people to find you. Use your real name as your profile name, or as close to it as possible if someone else has nabbed it. Include links to your profiles and accounts in your email stationary, preferably in the form of Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn buttons. Add buttons to your blogs and web pages.

Do

Share what others have kindly shared with you. If someone has sent you a funny, interesting or useful link pass it on – like it, retweet it and reply to it. Validation is a two-way street.

Do

Keep it going. If you can’t tweet or visit Facebook or LinkedIn for a couple of days it’s not a train smash, but try not to let too much time pass between updates. It gives the impression that you don’t really care, especially if you only pop back to send a link relevant to you.